Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and your heart so that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses. You build up a whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life. You give them a piece of you. They didn’t ask for it. One day, they did something so stupid to you like kissed you or smiled at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. You begin to lose all sense of reality. You lose control over the situation. You give into temptation. You lower your walls that you spent years building. All for one person. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you up and leaves you crying in the darkness. A simple phrase like ‘maybe we should be just friends’ or ‘how very perceptive’ turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts — not just in the imagination, not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. Love is having your heart feel like an overcrowded lifeboat. You throw your pride out to keep it afloat, and your self-respect and independence. After a while, you started throwing people out – your friends and everyone you used to know. And it’s still not enough. The lifeboat is still sinking, and you know it’s going to take you down with it.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Saturday, January 21, 2012
In order to let go and live again, the past must be closed.
"Let go when you're hurting too much, give up when love isn't enough, and move on when things aren't like before".
Being hurt by someone whom you love is the worst thing that can happen to a person. If you love someone and your beloved hurts you, then you will be left broken, dejected and depressed. It really hurts you to the core, when your beloved hurts you in some or the other way. The worst way in which your beloved can possibly hurt is when your beloved calls it quits and ends the relationship. A broken relationship is very hard to erase from one’s mind and very difficult to deal with. It's hard to come over the memories of a broken relationship especially one that was going so good. Being hurt by someone you love is something that you cannot easily deal with. It is difficult to get over the wounds of the heart. The only option you have is to nurse your wounds and let them heal with time. Time is perhaps the best medicine to a broken heart.
"I'm not going to stress over you anymore. It isn't worth it", are the words that I constantly remind myself every second, of every hour, of every day. Sometimes enough is enough. I can only deal with someone's disrespectful words and treatment for so long. However, every girl has that one guy she goes back to, heartbreak after heartbreak, tears after tears, and nobody knows or understands why, not even her. She just can't seem to take that step forward. I have that one guy. Even though, I love him to the point where I would've given up my life to patiently wait for him, everyone has their limits. I realized that both of us have reached that limit where every conversation turns into an argument, every problem (small or big) doesn't get solve, and every words are curse words that come out of our mouths. I'm emotionally & physically drained. All that's left is to learn how to let go & hope that he realizes what he has before it's too late.
"I'm not going to stress over you anymore. It isn't worth it", are the words that I constantly remind myself every second, of every hour, of every day. Sometimes enough is enough. I can only deal with someone's disrespectful words and treatment for so long. However, every girl has that one guy she goes back to, heartbreak after heartbreak, tears after tears, and nobody knows or understands why, not even her. She just can't seem to take that step forward. I have that one guy. Even though, I love him to the point where I would've given up my life to patiently wait for him, everyone has their limits. I realized that both of us have reached that limit where every conversation turns into an argument, every problem (small or big) doesn't get solve, and every words are curse words that come out of our mouths. I'm emotionally & physically drained. All that's left is to learn how to let go & hope that he realizes what he has before it's too late.
How do you know when to let go? How do you know when you've had enough? Someone once told me the concept of letting go is a part of one’s growth process. In life, you need to let go of many things, at different points of time. You need to realize that life never stops and comes to a halt. It is extremely difficult to do so, but one has to do it. You cannot think about the future or the new happenings in life, if you continue clinging to the old.
I have learned and realized that one of the hardest things to do in life is to let go of a relationship. No matter what the cause of a breakup, learning to let go just isn’t the easiest thing to do. It could be the one that got away, a first love, a spouse, a boyfriend or girlfriend, or unrequited love. Regardless of the situation, learning to let go of what’s over is often a very difficult thing to do and the hurt can possibly last for years if you simply won’t break the hold. Recovering from the horrible pain and hurt of a broken relationship is not an easy task. When love is found, you naturally want to believe that it will last forever; it’s great when it does. But when it doesn’t, it can be devastating, even more devastating can be the pain and suffering you experience from not letting go of what’s gone and moving on with your life. All you have to do is leave the things the way they are and move forward. Easier said than done right? Always! But just take it one step at a time, one day at a time. It's okay if you fall back two, three, four, five, six or seven steps. I know that turning off feelings for for someone isn’t like turning off a light switch. If it was that easy, my life would have been that much more simple. When a relationship ends, it doesn’t mean the feelings disappear or go away instantly. It takes time to heal. Being left alone with feelings of emptiness, loneliness, anger, grief, rejection, and despair can prove to be overwhelming. You might find yourself attempting to contact the other person, making up reasons to be where the other person is, calling them repeatedly, etc…. anything to keep in contact with the other person or have some kind of hold or attachment still with them. And while it’s a natural to want to do this, it prevents you from being healed of the relationship. In order to let go and live again, the past must be closed. It is impossible to live in the past. You can’t look forward to a future when you live in what "was", rather than in the here and now. What has happened is gone, and no amount of wanting, wishing, or regret will undo or changed what’s already happened and is over with.
The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.
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